And before I go on, yes it is that ridonkulous. For example, after bragging about his ‘over two million hits of his youtube cooking, Coolio goes on to explain just how he became the king of the kitchen pimps, and how you can become a kitchen pimp too. 

Apparently the key is to follow the Ten Cool-mandments.

At any rate, upon receipt of this gift I had to promise to make use of said book, and report back.  This was a promise easily made, and here we are today. 

I chose a simple recipe to start out on my foray into kitchen pimpdom, “Cool-a-cado”, a simple recipe involving an avocado, tomatoes and onions, drizzled with olive oil and balsamic, then sprinkled with salt and pepper.

First you chop the avocado halves length and width-wise leaving it in its skin. Chop the tomatoes and onions in the standard way.

The rest is mere preparation, put the chopped tomatoes in the pit hole, sprinkle the onions on top of that. Then drizzle balsamic and olive oil, and salt n’ peppa and you’re done. Coolio doesn’t say to squeeze the avocado to loosen the flesh, but I find this works well to let the liquids seep in. He does say to poke cut the flesh to allow for the absorption of the vinegar and oil, but after you’ve done all the other stuff it seems like all it would do is ruin your plating…

So that looks alright, except that even cutting Coolio’s ingredients down to half an onion and a small tomato leaves us with quite a bite of leftovers, so we plate again.

So that’s the cool-a-cado. Now, don’t forget your dime bag of salt, and nickel bag of pepper.

There’s more info on Coolio’s cooking after the jump.