Hardly Magniloquent

Toytrailers Mix

Not to be outdone by mere superheroes of the comic book variety, toys themselves have made it to hollywood. I speak of movies based on properties that originated as toys.  As with the Supertrailers mix these are also ‘old’ by internet standards. The trailers came out during the American TV extravaganza that also features a little sport.

Why post things that are already stale on the internet? Well just in case you, fair reader, may have missed them when they first hit. You know when all your media sites were only posting them, or shit about them. Call it Internet Round 2: Stale but not mouldy.

But I digress.

Now I have to state that although I was a big fan of the toy nothing about the original film, in the leadup or *any* reviews, made me want to approach it with a 12 inch detailed action figure. However colour me in negative if my opinion on the upcoming sequel is not an inversion of the first. I speak of none-other than G.I. Joe. Now with more Cobra Commander, Bruce Willis, and even a possible plot. Rather than just show the superbowl trailer, it turns out the French got a longer and more comprehensive trailer that makes an even more stronger impression that there may actually be a movie underneath all dem ‘splosions. Oh The Rock is in this one, but JGL and the Ninth Doctor are not.

Also Ninjas on Strings.
Right, now that we have got the pleasantly surprising number out, let’s move on to the most talked about movie-based-on-hasbro-intellectual-property^{Ouija. Its Battleship! How excited am I for this one? One can only be excited if they had always wanted to see Liam Neeson and Rihanna embarrass themselves on the same stage. If that’s you, boy are you in for a treat.}

You remember all the action that takes place on land in Battleship, right? And the unforgettable bits with the unstoppable alien army bent on genocide? Just in case you forgot here is a handy picture of the actual game.

Let’s not confuse it with the independent short from 2009. It’s got little information and is a merciful 14minutes long. Here’s the synopsis from the always reliable imdb:

“A guy and girl meet on a blind date and attempt to kindle a romance together despite their tendency to cheat… At board games.”

So it seems it wins against the hollywood entry on virtually every level.  Even if embarrassing, script wise, it demeans only people looking to work and be creative. Its 14min long, so fuck it how bad could it be. And of course it has something to do with the bloody board game.

If that wasn’t enough to muddy the waters, it appears that there is a video game coming out to accompany the movie. Judging by the trailer (below if you want to bother) it seems like a much more action packed game than… well  Battleship®.

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